21-March-2020

My Thoughts 21 March 2020

Today morning as I feel the helpless to not being able to service the mankind in this situation, I recall the same time 4 years back same month (March -2016), same place doing the same activity ( walking ). After my surgery in Jan-2016 and being on medication, I was dealing with depression and I would not find any reason for living ( Thanks to my kids, they are the reason I came back from the step of taking away my life) . As I started praying Almighty to show me direction, I got a sudden thought to look into my childhood.  I started recalling my life journey and as I started with my childhood, I remembered the child I was , that loving, the kind, the compassionate, the vulnerable girl who always only believed that life is beautiful and everyone is loving who was always chirping. As she looked at poor people and elder people struggling with food and basic necessities, her heart would melt to do something for them. She would prepare food herself and go to temple so she could feed those people sitting out with the food cooked by her own hands. Can you even imagine the compassion she had? Tear roll out and I have goose bumps as I remember that girl.

Coming back to March 2016 on the terrace thinking all this I got my answer. As a child when I used to feel helpless for these people , my heart would say what is the use of that intention when you cannot do anything. That is the point I had decided to study and attain a degree that would help me earn lots of money so I can help people.

Life has its own path. I was married at an early age even without completing my education. My determination was strong and my Faith in my Baba was intact. I completed my education, an awesome job, traveled to US, built my home. 

Now what?  I haven’t done anything for those dreams of mine for which I wanted to earn money. I lost track of it and got busy in my family life. As I stand in depression trying to give meaning to my life, I say to myself  “Anu you have done nothing good for this world, what answer will you give you Almighty once you go there? “ And I begged my Almighty to give me my life back and I found my life purpose to help people around.

To be able to help others, you yourself need to help yourself and know all the techniques, tools, skills to be able to help others and I started working on myself.

March-2020 : Today when the world is dealing with this epidemic of Corona, I have 2 thoughts.

One, if I die today, I will die with content and no guilt or regret. These 4 years I have done every bit and as much as I can to raise the vibration of this universe. People follow your example and not advise, and I am content I did as much I can. Of course, there is always scope to do more and this is just the beginning.  One of my best decision has been to work on myself, so I can help people work on themselves and I am blessed with the world’s best coach who understands me and coaches to get the best out of me.

Second, as the Universe is shifting and people are realizing their existence. This is the time when people need help to look inside and I have to do everything I can to elevate peoples lives. I am grateful to Almighty for choosing me as the vessel to be of help to mankind.