Time to remind myself of my achievements

Today, 14th Oct 2016 and I am supposed to be sick and taking rest. My family would be unhappy if they see me using my laptop doing something. Happily all of them are out on their jobs and my Mother in law busy with her household chores downstairs . With T.V. playing some of my favourite songs I enjoy and one of them currently playing

"Aage bhi jane na tu, peeche bhi jaane na tu, basi yehi ek pal hai "

I decided to write down my achievements that I should be happy and proud of. I know I have achieved so much in life with the help of my almighty, but somehow I haven't been able to have that feeling of achievement. Do you get what I mean? It could be
1) I was too busy achieving that I did not celebrate them from within
2) May be I had so much to overcome and afraid of celebrating before I achieved everything.
3) There were critics all over and very less supporters and I did not have power within me to overcome them
4) I was afraid of making mistakes because of constant critics and people pulling me back instead of helping me forward or at-least not interfering.
5) I cannot blame people for all this because I now know its neither their fault nor mine. It could be circumstantial, it could be our upbringing and its hard for people to accept someone in their family or surrounding to achieve.

Anyways, more than anything I think it was me who wasn't celebrating myself from within,
So, today finally I decided to write down which has been on my mind for so long. So, here I go.

I spent some good years of my childhood with my Maternal Grandmother and I am so blessed to have her in life, the greatest blessing in fact. She was such a cool and understanding woman that I haven't been able to find anyone like her so far. Getting back to topic of writing today.
1) Studied in Hindi medium government school until 4th standard from backward villages in Haryana and Rajasthan and then started with standard 1st in Hyderabad. Jumped from 1st to 3rd and to 5th to catch up. Wow that was an achievement for me from Hindi medium to English medium that too in a developed city. Not just that,  I always stood 1st, 2nd or 3rd in my classes :)  :) :).

2) That reminds me of an event when I was in 4th standard in my village school and Mathematics teacher had asked a question on division and entire class of around 40 students were standing with only me giving the correct answer and the Masterji gave me 20 Paise as a price. That time 20 paise was a big thing, I still remember I could buy 2 long sticks of sugarcane. More than the price, it was the achievement and the way I shared it with mom and the way she was happy and appreciated me was the best happiness ever.

3) Being able to do 4th standard division sums while being in 3rd standard was another one that I still remember.
4) I loved dancing and my dance teacher would always select me for the annual school function from so many children.
5) My dance teacher admiring my dance steps and elegance and making me stand in the front was something to be happy and I still remember my school Vice principal being jealous of me performing on each school function such that she would pick another girl and make her dance to compete with me :).
6) I was one of the best in my Karate classes as well. Whenever the children in class would not concentrate he would say keep quiet otherwise I will make you fight with Annapurna :)

7) Being able to clear class 10th with more than 70% was an achievement as well, not just because of my marks, but the amount of hard work I put and the learning we have during the course of achievement.

8) Being married at early age and being able to convince my husband and father in law to help me study further.
9) No one in my maternal side liked me coming back to their home for an year after marriage to complete my 12th standard. I was determined and I still took all their critics, bad words and still did it.
10) My 11th standard marks were in 60's and in Hyderabad , both 11th and 12th marks are together counted and now that I had come against all odds fighting to study, I could not afford to stay average.  With 1 year gap in between 11th and 12th, the college faculty did not want me to go for 11th class improvements because if I had failed, then I would have to so my 11th again. I took the responsibility of anything happening and the college allowed me. When my results came, I had improved by 100 marks increasing my percentage from 60's to 88 %. I was being appreciated by all my teachers as no one else had made that much improvement in so many years.what an amazing achievement after all the hard work, sleepless hours, depression of not  being able to study after one year gap. Yes, I did it :) :) :).
11) Back to my in laws and more critics of why the hell does your bahu want to study. I think I will write a separate story on it. For now, my father in law and husband managed to help me with my Graduation first year and I stayed in a room in the town of my school with my father in law and mother in law. My husband would visit us once in a month or so.That was quite an achievement that after so many struggles and everyone asking me/ scolding me to stop all this, that I managed to make it here.
12) Due to circumstances, I failed in 1 or 2 subjects and when I was already depressed, all the people who got a chance just added to my depression. My father in law then changed my college and I cleared my exams and i never looked back.
13) Being able to clear my previous supplementary along with current year exams and all this while having a baby was phenomenal. Thanks to the support from my father in law, mother in law and my husband.
14) Being a mother of an adorable child, a feeling that is beyond any words.
15) Completed my Graduation with above 70% and got admission in a Post Graduate college.
16) First job and moving to Gurgaon. My work was always appreciated at my first company and I made some good friends.
17) I kept applying for jobs and finally got my job in second company which was another turning point of my life.
18) I have so many achievements and leanings from my second organisation as well.
19) My mother was diagnosed with Cancer in 2007 while I was pregnant with my second child. It was very difficult  for me to believe it and I still had hopes to cure it . I wanted to do anything and everything to get her out of that killer disease . I could not help her survive, that was the plan for her by God. I feel content to some extent that I was able to support her and my family during that time. I did what I could with my almighty's instructions. I rushed to her help from Gurgaon to Hyderabad when my second child was just 20 days. It gave some happiness to my mother to spend some time with the child, she could ask me anything to do for her which she would hesitate from others. She even took medicine from my hands which she did not want to otherwise. Her condition was getting worse and I had to join my office, so we decided to get her to my place at Gurgaon, went several times to Dharamsheela hospital, tries a homeopathy as well, Ayurveda as well, nothing was helping. Since, her condition was getting worse, my family too her back to village and she did not survive even for a week :(. I dont know if I should feel content that I was able to help in their difficult times or feel sad that I wasn't able to get them out of it. I still write it here with that confusion.

20) During the same time we took our first home in Gurgaon , with no money in hand, we took some personal loan and some money from my father for the down-payment and rest home-loan. So many people had criticised for taking so small home and I feel good now that at-least we took it .

21) I had to find an alternative to clear my loans as both our salaries weren't enough and one of my friend came to my rescue for providing me with an onsite opportunity. Initially for 3 months and goal to clear my personal loans, I flew to USA ( cant tell how how difficult it was to leave my 2.5 year old son away from me) Finally was able to clear my personal loans

22) The onsite opportunity continued and my greed to finish up my home loan as well. Thankfully was able to clear it as well.

23) Now, I wanted my family to visit USA once before I go back, for I wanted to show them which they have been dreaming off. VISA and everything was ready but my onsite opportunity ended in December. However, I did not want that guilt to stay with me and finally managed to get another opportunity and took my family with me . They stayed with me for 1.5 months and came back.

24) Now, I could not be selfish to go back India and finish up the opportunity given which was supposed to end by November. For some reason, the project went beyond, I was able to visit my family in between and My family visited me again in USA. I was so happy to see the smiles on their faces. My family still cherishes those moment and thank me for those. Well that an achievement :) :)

25) early 2013, I planned to leave the project and come back to India. My husband wanted me to get my VISA renewed and take family along. I decided not to do that. My mother in law who supported us so much needed support now as she wasn't feeling well, I could not leave her to others . I feel happy that I took that decision and my mother in law is in good condition now :).

26) I love my friends and I am always with them in their good/bad times. I am blessed to be able to do that. Should I count that as my achievements?

27) My 2 independent, loving kids are my achievements
28) I am much stronger that ever before is my achievement
29) I take critics constructively
30) Its my achievement where I stand today. I did not accept to stay in a backward village with parda system, just cooking food for everyone, cleaning the house, listening to unnecessary critics in form of elders where your feelings do not matter all. That's why I firmly believe in the proverb "IF THERE IS A WILL THERE IS A WAY ".  It feels even more good to see where those critics stand today and where I am today. I am so blessed to have my almighty always be with me, show me the right path and because of whom I am here today.

It wasn't easy getting here and if you are determined its not tough as well. The obstacles I faced will be a different story, until then I am done for today . Thank you for reading :) :) and I know I am the best :P.